So you’ve just met someone new and you want to find out their true colours, their real intentions, their real motives and their real agendas. Is that you out their today? Not really sure with who you are hanging around with? It happens to all of us by the way and right now we are connecting more people through our life’s than ever before, but at the same time we’re also having a communication problem. A lot of the times you could say that you’ve got over two thousand friends, but only on social media, whereas in real life it’s a whole entirely different story. I’m going to share with you how to find out what people are really like deep down.
- Asking huge favours after just meeting. I remember meeting a person briefly one year ago where after meeting them the day after they said that I was a cool guy and that they wanted me to transfer them £100 as they were wanting to borrow money from me. Obviously I was blown away as it was a big favour being asked when I didn’t even know who this indivudal was as we just met. So what I got from that message is that many times we’re around certain people who we don’t even know well and they ask us for these outlandish favours. What these reveal about people is that these are the takers. In life you’ve got givers and then you’ve got takers, and you do get some people who just want to take from you, me personally I’m a giver. So I said to this person I couldn’t afford it, and then I didn’t even hear back from them. So that’s where you know that they just wanted that favour and nothing else, no interest in you. Life is about give and take, it’s all about being reciprocal.
- Wait until the end of everything. Time always reveals everything and people’s true colours in the end. So don’t worry about it, just focus on yourself and rise higher because it’s not about seeing other people’s true self, it’s about us knowing and understanding our own self. It’s happened to me in life, there were times where I’d be good friends with a person, then all of a sudden something happens and then their true colours come through. It could also happen through dating, in the end is when you know more about that person, because when people both go on a date everyone is smiling and laughing. Although the thing is that everyone on those dates are putting on this persona about themselves, so you don’t really know who that person is really until you go through a hard time together. In the end peoples true self’s are revealed, I’ve realised this that even if things didn’t work out that my true inner self will remain the same as it did at the beginning, but if people start changing because they can’t get their own way, then they reveal how they were really feeling to begin with as they’re just trying to hide that, besides you can’t hide the truth. So you just need to wait until the end to find out if someone really has been amazing to you all along or not.
- How people treat you says a lot about how they feel about themselves. It’s got nothing to do with you as in the majority of cases it’s got everything to do with how this person feels about themselves. If someone is swearing at you then it’s probably how they talk towards themselves in their head. If they don’t show you any respect or gratitude, chances are that they don’t show themselves any respect or gratitude. Everything is a mirror, and in a lot of cases we are all projecting onto other people, although it’s not in terms of every single case as certain times we have to get really straight with people and tell them certain things, which they may not want to hear, but it’s all about how you tell that person something. I always say that if someone is telling you something look at how they are saying it, so is it true, kind? And are they being honest? When people talk to you in a certain way maybe it’s not pleasant, maybe they’re not kind, maybe and in a lot of cases they’ve never been shown kindness in their life’s. Which is why they don’t know how to give it to you or other people. So I’ve always realised that if someone is treating me a certain way and it’s really positive then that’s how they really see themselves, as a person who is positive, optimistic and has a phenomenal attitude. If it’s not then they see themselves as feeling not worthy, never being shown that in their life, or through their childhood experiences, or it could just be that someone is basically just an arsehole. In a lot of cases people project onto you, that’s when people’s true self’s come out when they dump their emotional baggage onto you.
- I will only be friends with you if.. If there’s an ‘If’, then you start to see people’s true intentions, if you scratch my back I’ll scratch yours, if you don’t then you start to see people’s true intentions with things. If your friendship has a terms and conditions, or a contract where they say that they’ll only become friends with you if you do this or if you dress a certain way etc. Well the thing is that a lot of friendships are like that. Let’s go back to high school where you had a popular group, and then a middle group, and then a not so popular group, and then the weirdos, I was a weirdo. So many of us we live our life’s like that, and that’ show to really discover someone’s true self. Are they only friends with you because they can get somewhere or are they genuinely friends with you because they actually like you? You’ve got friends and then you’ve got aquintances, friendship is a whole different sotry it’s when someone messages you at 2am after they’ve been out late asking if you’re ok. Aquintances is like you’ve just won the lottery and then the person asks you what fancy restaurant you want to go out and eat at. They’re never there to help set up the party, they’re only there to come and drink and get drunk. Real friends will help you set up and they’ll drink too.
- I will only love you if.. That’s if your love is based once again on terms and conditions, and inevitably that is the toxic relationship. You want a relationship in which doesn’t have a contract and that there are no terms and conditions, where it’s unconditional. There is a reason why the divorce rate has increased because many people say they love the other person when they don’t really love them. What it is, is that they’ll only love you if you fulfil all the requirements needed, and if you don’t then they don’t love you anymore, and that’s how to discover someone’s true intentions. When you truly love someone it’s like the love a mother has for her child, it’s really unconditional and a lot of us will never really experience that. We say I love this person but once they don’t do what you want them to, or the tide changes then they say that they don’t want to talk to this person anymore. So what were you talking about to begin with? So people’s true being comes out in relationships, if someone genuinely does love you then they will still be friends with you even if the relationship didn’t pan out right the way you wanted it to be.
- I will only do this for you if.. I’m a lot like that myself because I feel it’s so beautiful to be reciprocal. I will only do this if you do that, which is good but then again there are some of us who take it to the extreme where they will only do this deed for me firstly. I’ve learned that it’s all about if you want to give then just give. For example I write and share my blog posts but you don’t have to sned me your blog posts, plus I love to do it, I love to help people out as much as I can. We discover people’s true intentions when they do things for us only because they want something back, but those who truly give people their heart, they don’t want anything back because they have already filled their own cup. Being reciprocal is amazing, but if you’ve got to give, please just give and don’t have to tell everybody how much you’ve given. Such as when I see people on social media posting about how they gave money and food to a homeless person on the street. I personally thin kit’s the wrong thing to do, as they are only doing so to gain recognition from their peers and to get that almighty great dopamine rush from the amount of like’s that they’ll get.
- Gossip. If someone gossips to you then there’s a high chance that they’ll gossip about you. Is that happening to you in your life? People talking to you about other people? They’re doing that to you too. I don’t entertain gossiping because I know that it’s a low frequency, it’s entertaining but in the long run it won’t last. So you begin to discover someone’s true intentions even more, when you are very aware of the kind of energy that you feel that they are bringing to you. Are they bringing you drama? Or are they bringing you something that you can live off forever? They’re talking to you about how amazing someone is, how about that instead of saying negative things about a person, you discover a lot about people always trying to create problems. So become aware in what this person is bringing you on a regular basis.
- The emotional pattern. Certain times people wonder why people have changed when we’ve been around them. Like your friends that you’ve always been cool with, you can talk to them about anything and everything having deep conversations. And at times they go a bit weird around you and crazy, which in itself is beautiful thing too, but underneath it all, the both of you have this stable emotional pattern when you are around each other. Sometimes however, we are around people were there are a lot of erratic emotional patterns, where they change instantly. One day it’s like they think that you’re amazing, and another day it’s like they don’t want to talk to you, is that happening to you? It’s happened to me before with people,including myself acting these type of ways. That’s why I have compassion to people who are doing that right now, because I’ve been included in these acts myself. A lot of times you realld do need compassion as most of these people don’t even know who they are themselves, although they’ll find out one day.
- Up bringers and down bringers. There are people who are afraid if you succeed, so they want to only bring you down, and if you’re hanging around someone who’s constantly criticizing you and they call you their friend, well the chances are they;’re probably not. Real friends criticize you to help you grow, you have these up lifters in life. I’ve connected with so many up lifters, their always happy for me and I’m always happy for them as I can see their true intentions. Then there are people on this planet believe it or not who just wish people well and it’s an incredible thin to see. The people who bring you down are always trying to see what’s working for you, they’re always trying to bring havoc into your life, so avoid them at all costs.